Let's Talk About | The F Word

January 14, 2014

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Don't worry, I'm not planning on cursing at you profusely throughout this post. I don't mean that F word. Although to be honest, that could, quite possibly, be a less controversial post in some people's opinion than what I am about to say. Brace yourself. This may be alarming.

I am a feminist. 

I am not a man hater. I enjoy wearing make up and taking pride in my appearance for myself, and the man in my life. I shave my legs. I don't plan on burning my bras any time soon either. I want nothing more than to be a wife and a mother. I want to be able to support myself but have the opportunity to be a stay at home mum, if I choose.

Feminism seems to be such a dirty word. Women all over the world preface their opinions with the words "I'm not a feminist but..." Why is it that wanting equality of the sexes is such a bad thing?  Does it not make sense, in this day and age, that we recognise that we are all human and should be given the same opportunities in life? After all, that is exactly what the definition of feminism is: "the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of equality of the sexes."

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The main misconception when it comes to feminism is that all feminists are just men haters whose sole goal in life is to emasculate men.  Of course, it would be a bare faced lie to say that no one feels this way but it certainly isn't how I would define the type of feminist that I am. In some circles, women are still very much considered the weaker sex, less intelligent and dependant on men to take care of them. Why? Men and women, alike, have their flaws, not as a gender but as individuals. In what way is it fair to not allow both sexes the same opportunities and rights?

I believe that all women deserve the right to choose how they live their lives, in all capacities. To me, feminism is much the same as any other fight for equality.  So many doors in the world are closed to women purely based on their gender and as a feminist, I don't think this is fair. Being told you're not good enough to do something based on gender or not being paid the same wage as your male counterpart is wrong.

I want for any of my future daughters (and sons) to have all the doors of the world left open for them. Hell, I don't want there to be any doors on the door frames! I want to know that my children will grow up in a world where their gender is not important, where race, sexual orientation, religion and skin colour are no longer reasons for hatefulness, where everyone is considered equal. I know it is a big ask, and unlikely to happen too, but it is what I mean when I talk about feminism.

I am Debi and I am a feminist, striving for equality between the sexes.

What about you? Are you a feminist?

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  1. I could agree more. Sadly I often see us women downgrading ourselves and others by the way we talk on twitter - especially when it comes to celebrities and criticizing. We can't help ourselves as women gain the equality we deserve if we can't respect each other. It's even really important to note the inequality between women of race, during the Golden Globes the Miss Representation twitter page were retweeting facts about the lack of women (say directing or being nominated) but what was worse was just the lack of black women nominated. It's horrific.

    Also someone asked me once how could I be a feminist when I changed my surname to my husbands when we got married (yet along why did I have to get married)?! I just .... facepalm.

  2. I completely agree. It's horrible that some women don't help to support other women. I just think that there should be equality across the board. I really don't see why there has to be any difference in the way all humans are treated.

    Debi x


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