Mind Matters | Dealing with Wedding Day Anxiety

August 21, 2014

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Here's a little secret: despite being the most stressed out person on the planet for the month previous to our big day, I was surprisingly relaxed as I got ready for the wedding. 

That isn't to say that in the run up to the wedding I wasn't having to employ every coping mechanism that I knew of. I was. I had to. Every time my brain decided to remind me that the wedding was just around the corner my stomach dropped and I felt nauseated. Any little thing was enough to send me spiralling into a panic.

I started to spend a quick ten minutes every day meditating. It might sound a little strange - in the past I would never have pictured myself meditating! Sitting in a quiet room for ten minutes, with or without some relaxing music playing, eyes closed, concentrating on nothing but my own breathing gave me a sense of calm that I didn't expect and helped me to forget about the stress and worry even if only momentarily.

I also used some herbal remedies to help steady my nerves. I'm no health or medical professional and so I have no idea if there is any scientific benefit to using such things but I was happy to give them a shot even if only for a placebo kind of effect. 

I started taking Kalms two weeks before the wedding; one tablet twice a day for the first week and two tablets twice a day for the second. I used to take these when I was at school, especially around exam time. I'm sure I was able to feel a bit of a difference during those two weeks. I no longer felt completely overwhelmed with every mention of the word "wedding".

I also would use my Jan de Vries Emergency Essence when  things got a bit too much for me which, with the Kalms, was only once or twice. If I felt myself getting too worked up I would just pop five drops of this on my tongue and try to take deep breaths. I even had this in my bag at the wedding in case I had a bit of a meltdown but I never needed to use it.

On the actual day, I was just as surprised as everyone else by how calm I was. Everything would, indeed, come together just like people had said it would and if it didn't who cared? So long as I was getting to marry that handsome man in front of the people I love nothing else really mattered.

Upon realising this I felt as though my worries really did just melt away. I was able to immerse myself in our special day without becoming overwhelmed and anxious. I didn't need to hide away from everyone because it all got too much.

Yes, I was nervous. I can't deny that. However for the first time in a real long while it was manageable. It was understandable. It wasn't irrational. Honestly, I think that was the key.

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  1. I could never see myself as a meditating person but I know when things get too crazy for me, I go to bed, so I guess I'm kind of meditating. I'm glad everything together for you. Maybe now you have experienced the 'ultimate stress' things might pale in comparison to it and they might be easier to handle.

    1. Ugh, I'll always suffer from stress and anxiety and I've come to terms with that. I just hope that I'll never feel so out of control with it again. In the past I have been fairly good at dealing with it. So much so that other people have barely noticed. However with the wedding I let it get on top of me way too much and really suffered! It felt a bit odd to try meditating at first but it really chills me out now!
      Debi x


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